how i miss waking up

as i was riding home today, "sound of your voice" by barenaked ladies came on my ipod. i started bopping my head along, trying not to mouth out the lyrics so that people wouldn't watch me too closely. and then it happened. this intense wave of emotion. i felt an eerie feeling of familiarity in my stomach and was transplanted to 2006, when this song first came out. i remember first hearing this song and being a little iffy about it - there was a definite country twang to it that put me off. but after i listened to the song a couple more times, the lyrics overpowered the slightly disturbing twang and i embraced the song.

you see, i've always been a lyrics person. i can listen to songs and usually pick up lyrics after hearing something the second or third time around. i can (mostly accurately) predict song lyrics and am good at deconstructing songs when the lyrics are unclear. this has been particularly useful in sound design, as i often pick songs based not only on feeling but on deeper lyrical value. i think a songwriter is a brilliant person, someone who can create music but also can write poetry that fits within a rhythm and makes sense in a specific beat per minute set-up. it's a skill that i've always been incredibly envious of.

this has meant that i've had a long-standing love of music, especially songwriters who i think are really smart and beautiful. paul simon, for example, is one of my favorite artists because he seems to never run out of amazing material for songs. only recently i came across this list of songs that he's written and it is staggering. another personal favorite is barenaked ladies. i've always appreciated this group's funny, quick, and caustic lyrics - "you could hid out under there/ i just made you say underwear."

this brings me to bnl's "sound of your voice." you see, this song came to represent a lost love for me. it came out when i was in the middle of a breakup and couldn't have been more apt. it opens:

the moon is full by there is an incompleteness

the days are beautiful but i feel a bitter sweetness

if i had a wish or even a choice

i'd wake up to the sound of your voice

how i miss waking up to the sound of your voice

wow. does that hit the breakup vein or what? who of us have not felt some inexplicable emptiness after a breakup? that annoyance that you used to get from the person next to you groaning about waking up is definitely among the first thing you miss when it's gone. bnl, i don't know how you did it but i remember hearing this song and being like yes. man. they totally know what i'm going through. and no, it doesn't stop there...

i let you down and fell off of your good list

i hope each day you'll find peace and forgiveness

the alarm clock rings, what a lonely noise

and i long for the sound of your voice

oh how i miss waking up to the sound of your voice

every time i hear it, i still tear up a little. this song just completely represented this feeling of loss i had. how did bnl know i hurt the person i missed? the alarm clock is such a lonely noise, but i had never thought of it like that before this song. and i really did long for the sound of my significant other's voice, but alas that person was across an ocean.

the last verse of this song is really what did it for me, though.

this thing goes there will be other dances (don't give up)

this little song is about second chances

just say the word and i will rejoice

and wake up to the sound of your voice

some relationships really do end and that's that. but i knew deep down that this relationship shouldn't end, some pieces just weren't really in their proper place. and now that we're back together, the song reminds me of the importance of yearning and loss, but then the happiness of regaining what you once took for granted.

so there you go. there are a few more repeats of the chorus at the end of this song, but for me it's all about the verses. the words are so simple, but they really clarified the jumble of emotions i felt in the fall of 2006. i think that is what a really good song does, it speaks to you in a way that nothing else can. the rhythm and instrumentation really brings you in. and then the lyrics envelop you in a wave of emotion that just seems so perfect for your mood. music is all around us, we best learn how to appreciate it.